To my mother
I won’t go for the cliché and thank you for all those things you have done. Because I won’t. You know I love you and how important a part you have been in my life.
We have celebrated 21 years of mother’s day together.
But something feels different this year. This year, I am entering as your friend more than your daughter.
So as a friend, today, I want to tell you that-
Take the day off! I don’t want you to be waiting for every day with hot snacks and open ears. I can do without that.
Everything doesn’t have to be perfect around you for us. It’s okay if there’s a crease in my bedsheet, if my shoes are at the wrong place or my shirt was not ironed.
It’s okay if we can order from a restaurant when you are just bored to cook. It’s okay to splurge when you can afford it. It’s okay when you buy that expensive dress or jewellery. You don’t NEED to feel guilty.
You don’t need to diet, you look really good! And even if you want to, then it’s okay to cheat for a day.
It’s okay when your maid doesn’t come. I don’t really like to stay in something so spick and span. Mess feels more real.
It’s okay when you want to work. It’s okay when you have a plan with your colleagues, or friends from school or college, and I can’t go! Everything doesn’t have to be about us. It’s okay to come home at 12 am in the night. I promise I won’t say anything to dad.
It’s okay when you have to stay back at your mom’s. You can’t deal with everything alone. It’s okay to want her presence more than you need ours! I love grandma to bits and I can take care of the house for a while.
It’s okay when you just don’t feel like talking. It’s okay for wanting to stay in, in the mornings and not attend that yoga class. It’s okay when you don’t go for your morning walk. It’s okay when you don’t want to function that day. It’s okay to snap. After all, you have been the target of our snappy attitude since ages.
In fact please do so, without feeling ANY GUILT.
The household work is never-ending. It’s okay if it doesn’t happen for a day.
Today I wanna tell you,
It’s okay to want something you aren’t supposed to! It’s okay to wear a short dress without worrying about your figure or setting a good example. It’s okay to wake up at 10 am or 11 am once in a while! It’s okay to walk in at 12 am when you have plans with your friends. It’s okay to go to that place you really want to go no matter how far it is. It’s okay when you don’t wait for dad or me to take you to movies or different places and you make your own plans! It’s absolutely entirely OKAY.
Let go of your ‘be there for everyone’ attitude. You are an individual first, a mother later. Don’t wait for your kid to grow up to live YOUR life. You know you did a pretty good job yourself and you deserve more than a pat on your shoulder. You deserve the world and more! But today, now that I am your friend.
Put yourself first. You lived for 20 years in the shadow of your husband and your kid.
It’s time to loosen the chains.
And when you come back from being you to being my mother, dad and I will be waiting with open arms to hear all about the days YOU HAD just like you have heard about our 10,000 days.
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